The REALLY odd couple
by Shadow ScytheX
Summary: Here's a first: Ryou/Mai!
1. And So It Begins

For Yami no Hikari's competition, I bring you… The REALLY odd couple  
  
Ryou was walking down the street, looking nowhere in particular, when some thugs ganged up around him. 2 thoughts were circling his head: ' I'm in for it now!' and 'They should have one of those automatic insurance machines.' The thugs then approached and beat the living snot out of him. "Pleasure doin' business with ya', chicken shit!" ' God. I can't let Yami see these bruises, or he'll steal their souls!' He hated them, but not THAT much. As luck would have it, Mai Valentine was walking through the park. She helped him up and asked him, " Are you alright? It looks like they ruffed you up pretty badly." He responded, " Yea, I'm alright…" but suddenly collapsed right on the spot.  
  
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Ryou awoke in a nice warm bed with an ice pack on his head. 'Mai must have brought me in her house.' He touched the back of his head, and winced in pain. 'Damn. They hit hard!' Mai then walked in and was happy to see Ryou walking around again. He was staring out an open window, looking at the huge drop down. "Damn! This is huge for a house!" Ryou said. " Well, if you're a champion Duelist, you have a LOT of money to burn," Mai said, placing the tray of tea she'd brought for them. "Huh! Oh, sorry Mai, didn't see you there," he said. "Domo agriato," he continued.  
  
"Don't sweat it. Here, have some tea," she said, handing him a cup. " Thanks. I really haven't been able to be civil lately, because my uncle's been getting drunk again. He can remember where I live, but can't remember his own name," he said, smiling. 'He's really a nice guy,' Mai thought. ' I can't see why anyone would want to hurt him.' "Hey, Mai," he asked, with the smile growing smaller, " did I have a pendant with me when I passed out?" She said, " No, why?" He responded, "Oh, well. He won't hurt them extremely badly." He took a sip of his tea. She asked, " Who?"  
  
"My Yami." 


	2. That Akward Age of 5000

Author's Notes: Procrastination is the universe's way of telling me to SLOW DOWN, not to STOP ENTIRELY. So, let's start this bad mofo!   
  
And if you'd like to know why the other one was so short, there's a perfectly good reason: Suspense.  
  
The REALLY Odd Couple  
  
Chapter 2: That Akward Age of 5000....  
  
As you might've figured, Bakura was now in the bandit's hideout, tied up, while staring down the boss of the gang.  
  
"Gee, boss, how did he come out when you banged that ring against the desk?"  
  
"I don't know. I guess I'm some kind of genius!" He then gave a bragging smirk to his gang, who all laughed at his pitiful joke.  
  
"YOU PATHETIC, WRETCHED HUMAN!!!!! LET ME OUT OF THIS CHAIR RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME RA I WILL KICK YOUR ASSES TO ARMAGEDDON!!!!!!!!!!" Bakura then struggled   
  
to get free of his bonds, got one hand free and tried to dig around his pocket for his Hobo Knife. He then sent a mental message to his hikari telling him to go get Mariku's help.  
  
****  
  
"I really must thank you for what you have done for me. I might not have made it that time..."  
  
"My, you're one for dramatics. It was only a few deep cuts."  
  
"If it makes you feel better, I can retain feeling in my legs. Because for someone who took care of me, you don't seem to have a lot of empathy in your heart."  
  
"Well, that seems rude!"  
  
Ryou then clutched his head in pain. "Fine. I don't need your help. Let me use your telephone to call someone who will pick me up."  
  
"Fine! Go ahead, you snotty, conceited, albino punk!"  
  
"Well, that was low classed, you wretched, forgettable, dumbass slut! Why do you always wear tie-up tops? That the only thing you fit in?"  
  
"EXCUSE ME!?!?!?!?!?"  
  
"You heard me." Ryou then stalked off to the phone, called Malik, and in 5 minutes, his yami was there to pick Ryou up... And save Bakura. Ryou put his helmet  
  
on, and as they were driving away, Ryou flipped Mai off.  
  
'Hmm... He's got a bit of fire...' she thought. "I like that."  
  
****  
  
Ryou then thanked Mariku, got off of the side car, then found Mai waiting at his door.  
  
"What are YOU doing here?"  
  
"Why, it's my right to be here!"  
  
"No it's not. It's trespassing."  
  
"Not if your old man LET'S me in."  
  
"...Damn perverted old fool." Ryou then grimaced. 'I sound like Bakura...'  
  
"You're lucky: I wouldn't have given someone with an attitude like yours a second thought, but you seem different, somehow..."  
  
"I wouldn't look into my actions TOO deeply. Just a little bit on the grumpy side today." Ryou then gave a sweatdrop and a smile.  
  
"Care for a stroll?"  
  
"Of course. I'd love to go on a nice little walk."  
  
****  
  
Bakura then smirked, and brandished his knife threatiningly. 'Haven't killed anyone yet... Damn, must be going soft.'  
  
"OHHHHHHH!!! I want to live the Hobo life, gutting people with my Hobo Knife, living out that stereotype, OHHHH, the Hobo Life!"  
  
The gang members backed away, as he expected. Bakura seized the chance, grabbed the ring, and gave a little wave. "Bye!" He then did a backflip out the window  
  
and into the sidecar of Mariku.  
  
"You took long enough. NOW GO, GO, GO!!!!! YOU STILL OWE ME FOR BATTLE CITY!!!"  
  
"Alright, alright, you damned sideseat driver! Geez, you'd thnk a tomb robber would be more patient." And with that, Mariku started the engine and drove off,  
  
leaving a trail of dust as the only indication he had been there. 


End file.
